Saturday, January 16, 2010

Criticism is an indirect form of self-boasting.

Why do we let some things bother us so much? I think I have a decent grasp of my priorities. My work involves a lot of time outside of the traditional work day, but I really try to include my family in the after-hours stuff - like watching game after game after game of the sport du jour (but let's face it, there is nothing painful about watching our varsity boys play ball!) I try to attend each and every activity, skipping one here or there when there isn't a way to resolve a conflict with my personal/family schedule. So why do I let the little comments get to me?

What I hear: "You missed the ___(fill in the blank with the "disaster" or "near miss" that happened after I left...that I couldn't have helped with anyway, but nonetheless...)___ last night after you left!" My read: "Why did you leave so early, you slacker?" My reality: "Holy crap, I need to get these kids home to bed! It's 9:45 and they have school tomorrow!" And finally, my conversation with my co-worker who stayed longer than I did: "Last night? Oh, yea...      (fill in the blank with the small issue that was resolved with a little legwork from the two who stayed)   ? It wasn't a big deal - we handled it."

Isn't it weird that comments from one person feel like criticism while you don't read that same criticism into another's comments? I found a quotation that says, “Criticism is an indirect form of self-boasting” (Emmet Fox). I wonder if it's true in this case? Bottom line, I need to do what I know is right by my family and me while continuing to work hard professionally...and for heaven's sake! STOP READING INTO WHAT PEOPLE SAY!

3 comments:

Pat said...

You're right! Give yourself a break. I don't know anyone who works harder than you do. Or is more conscientious than you are. I'm continually amazed by all that you do. Keep doin' what yer doin' -- Love you...

Unknown said...

if it's working for you and your family, that's all that matters. (but it still hurts.) i'm betting that the person delivering that comment is wishing he/she could juggle everything as well as you do.

Jennifer said...

I LOVE this quote! Mom is right...there deifinitely aren't many people working harder or caring more & you ALWAYS keep your family in mind. Snide comments ALWAYS hurt & I'm guessing thats really what they are meant to be. Even if they aren't, just let them roll off. You have your sanity to think of!